"So where do the giblets go? I put the bird in the oven, and he is still freaking out....How do you know he is done? Does the feather suit come off with a zipper? Now how am I suppose to stuff the stuffing up the turkey's butt? How do you tell the light meat from the dark when the thing is frozen sold? I stick the meat thermometer where? How much oil and what kind do you need to deep fry this bird? What's the little bag of turkey guts for? Can you just give me a number of some place that is open to order pizza cause this turkey dinner is way too complicated!"
And this is why dachshunds have us cook the turkey why they ask all the questions on the turkey cooking hot line.